Saturday, August 30, 2008

For your consideration...

May I recommend Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium. I lovely little sweet and silly bit of ridiculousness.

Shortly after finishing it I almost dropped my library card in the toilet. That would've been unfortunate.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Wedding Coordinators

This last weekend we went to a friend of Caleb's wedding in Fort Worth. As we're walking up to the church this lady stops us at the door and goes "Holland/Carter Wedding?" like she was a bouncer keeping people from just wandering in off the street. Really, I don't know her purpose. This made me think back to all the church wedding coordinators I've run into in my life. I have been in a couple weddings in the same church (which will remain nameless), but the lady there has sucked the fun out of every rehearsal. She doesn't allow talking, laughing, smiling, or merriment of any kind. I mean give us some credit. At some point in our lives, we've all had the summer where like 5 different people get married, and let's face it, it's not rocket science. You walk down slow, but not too slow, don't hold the flowers too high, etc, etc...
This wedding was one of the worst case of church wedding coordinator-itis ever. There were 3 of them and they had walkie talkies. We all know when you give someone a walkie talkie you have handed them all power and decision making responsibilities in the situation. The first one barely let us in the door. After the ceremony, we went out to the car to get their gift and walked back in the same door. I'm walking, holding a present, towards the present table and she appears from no where and goes "Holland/Carter Wedding?" again. Let me take a moment to tell you Holland/Carter Wedding was plastered everywhere on the church, there was no misreading where you were. I wanted to say something along the lines of, "Who?? I just wandered in with this present and thought I would leave it here." But instead I just smiled and said "Yes."
So they have everyone roped into this one section, but the poor planning was that the ladies restroom, was not in that section. It was in the section with the present table that I happened to be in, so I turned to go that way and I feel her following me. Granted, I was heading in the direction of the sanctuary where they were taking pictures, but she followed me all the way to the bathroom door. I tried to bob and weave a couple times to lose her on the way, but she was too good. On the way out of the bathroom I passed about 10 girls coming in, so I think there must have been a hostile takeover.
Then I'm waiting outside for Caleb who had to fight his way into the men's bathroom. He finally makes it out, but tells me that he had to face another woman to get out of the building. I guess the door he was trying to leave through was by the buffet and the lady actually grabbed his arm... like he was trying to steal the roast beef or something, and says, "Where do you think you're going?" By this time we were a little done with these ladies, so he jerked his arm out of her hand and said, "I'm trying to leave the building."
Makes me think back to our wedding rehearsal where the wedding coordinator made us all do a Jewish ritual. I don't remember what it was, because at the time we were all looking at each other and going, "She knows we're not Jewish right?"

Friday, August 22, 2008

7 Rules for Making Your Home Life Happier

Questionnaire from the June 1933 issue of American Magazine in an article entitled, "Why Marriages go Wrong."

For Wives
1. Do you give your husband complete freedom in his business affairs, and do you refrain from criticizing his associates, his choice of a secretary, or the hours he keeps?
2. Do you try your best to make your home interesting and attractive?
3. Do you vary the household menu so that he never quite knows what to expect when he sits down to the table?
4. Do you have a intelligent grasp of your husband's business so you can discuss it with him helpfully?
5. Can you meet financial reverses bravely, cheerfully, without criticizing your husband for his mistakes or comparin him unfavorably with more successful men?
6. Do you make a special effort to get along amiably with his mother or other relatives?
7. Do you dress with an eye for you husband's likes and dislikes in color and style?
8. Do you comproives little differences of opinion in the interest of harmony?
9. Do you make an effort to learn games your husband likes, so you can share his leisure hours?
10. Do you keep track of the day's news, the new books, and new ideas, so you can hold your husband's intellectual interest?

Interestingly, this is all probably still good advice.
In keeping with #10 we've started getting the Wall Street Journal and I've been trying to at least read the front section. So far that's about as far as I can get before I get too mad and frustrated at the world to continue!

However, I was delightfully surprised to find a review of the movie "House Bunny" with Anna Faris. I don't really think my movie tastes probably match up with the good old WSJ, but I thought it was funny they did a review of it anyway. I picture some Anderson Cooper-esque guy having to write, "Shelley herself learns, for instance, that life is about more than being sexy; it's about being true to yourself." HA!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Election Education


Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Things that make me Happy

I have omitted the obvious...these are in no other order than when they pop into my head

1. Getting my nails and toes done... today I have chosen almost black for my nails, to match my mood
2. Good food, preferably cooked by someone else
3. Dancing with Blythe
4. Good music that I know every word to. Good being subjective... I know every word to Fergalicious
5. Caleb playing the guitar
6. Getting new books... THANKS JANET!!
7. Porch swings or really any swing
8. Cokes, candy, and anything fried... I know I'm a 5 year old
9. Going to the movies by myself
10. Wine, especially Rieslings.
11. Vodka, especially in a dirty martini with extra olives
12. My Aunt Tate's pickles... only 2 more weeks until I can eat myself silly
13. Walking through Anthropologie
14. Friday night dinners with Hayley

I could probably go on, but I will stop with those.

Monday, August 11, 2008

The Kids

I'm working on my funk... thanks everyone for your sweet words!

Sasquatch Puppykins, as she is affectionately called, has gained some weight. I tried to take a picture, but she's so dark you can't really tell. Since we got a gym membership we don't run with her but maybe once a week anymore. We also give her people food all the time. Yes, we're those people, but we've officially cut her off and she is P-I-issed. Last night she actually stole food from Blythe. So she's adjusting, goes back and forth between mad at us and pouty.

Our other baby, Blythe, has found her voice... and the volume seems to be stuck on LOUD. She's figuring out how to make her voice really high-pitched and screaming. She can make it really low, but it is always LOUD. She's loud. Her laugh, cracks me up everytime I hear it. It's more of a guffaw with a squeak at the end. It's so deep it doesn't seem to fit her until she squeaks at the end. It is greatness.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Funk

I'm in a funk. I have chosen not to write about the myriad of things that come to mind right now so I won't depress all of you.

You're welcome

Wednesday, August 6, 2008